Men wid no hair and women wid everything to bare...

they call it murda, and they blame it on me. i havnt typed out words here for some time. but cant they just let me be me? ouh k the year's beckoning an end and to usher in the new year seems pretty much redundant. i wash ma hair to remove the grease but how bout the evil that people have committed. send them thru a carwash and hope the soap is enough for everyone? i wanna travel; thaliand, france and australia are on the agenda. i wanna train, flirt and holiday with a certain someone(respectively). hahaha. i don know watz in store for me for the next 365 days. the horizon loooks kinda empty, for now. women are takin their fair share in me, but who knows, i might have set ma sights for the angel tht dropped from heaven. and i really wonder how women can throw a nuclear bomb on smth they arnt totally satisfied wid?? having second thoughts BEFORE payin is human nature. but After, is just pure disaster. they say therez a man in every woman, hence the word wo-man, but to behave entirely as one is sin. had i not have enough of such creature-features? isnt there one gentle soul out there whu seeks serenity, and not autocracy? think about it ladies, and let me know ya answers.

Im alive.

i guess my fans have felt empty after seein no words of wisdom on my page lately. yea yea, cut the fuckin crap yoll. i was really goin thru a horrible phase in life. and i hadnt had anyone there for me at all. i had to go to people to seek some compassion or conscolence. thtz how miserable ma life has become. i feel like im losin a grip on life. as the clock ticks away and time erodes, a distant calling becomes more prominent. the timely tale of deception that was brought forth by God, in the name life. so much hopes and dreams to be met by a dimension called fate.He starts everything and He puts a stop to everything. so watz the point of havin dreams and desires? im like a lone lost soul on this planet trynna make my way out of a path called misery. best frens, close frens, good frens, wateva rubbish people can conjure up. a lame excuse to feed the social expansion. i had to ride it out alone. just this four walls, the window, the bed, and occasionally the midnight walks leading to a few pints of beer. women, as one would say, is the cause AND destruction of man. a gf shd be someone who behaves as one in the rship, and not take the place of the guy and subdue him to fill in the role of the 'girl'. and woman, haiz i seriously dunno wat goes into sucha concuction. poison, could be an understatement. to no offense, He muz have been 'highly intoxicated' when producing Eve. partyin too much wid Adam got Him drunk i guess and out came a creature that has baffled man even till now! but then again, an answer to ma question wd be absurd. for one whu knows the ingredients wd be the creator himself, or maybe a superb pick-up artist whu has seen and done every woman that walks past.

Nike Free 7.0

"The word WOMAN is prolly the most disgusting thing that the dictionary as conjured into its ranks. THIS DOES NOT INCLUDE MA MUM, for she's an angel. God was prolly aslp when Woman, or shd i say Eve, was created. hence evil had fallen upon earth. the devil is in her. nothin positive occurs when she walks the earth. ive cried, and anth but cried, when im in close proximity of one. they never stay true, and onli cling on to the perception of happiness and deceptive behaviour. all the women close to me, have left for greener pastures. cuz im ugly? cuz im broke? or is it cuz i speak too good for you to comprehand or handle?? Women cant accept truth, but they fall for sweet talk and fony lies about their mirages. for i do not know wat purpose they carry on earth. to fuckin get screwed and harbour ma seedlings? or to destroy a harmonious yet malignant lifeform called earth? the latter perhaps, sees more truth. these morphians shd be destroyed. nothin has been gained from 'em. onli the tears of broken hearts and the blood of broken bones seep through the earth and fill the land that has been cast a-shadow upon by these once lovely creatures." - to those who feel im outright hideous with ma language, or feel that you do not belong to this horrible caste, then please forgive me. You fall in the ranks as angels. for the rest of you scumbags, ive got nothin further to say.

all i wanna know..

time tells. or so they say.

watz diwali without grandpa? asked grandma. watz life without him, i thought. conspicuous as it seems, it was an un-deniable fact that his presence is greatly missed and his absence, greatly felt. it somehow downpours on the festive mood and bargains with the days happenings. it was so uneasy as i entered the house. the silence was goin thru the goosebumps. the smiles and handshakes hid the sorrows and disturbia within. even i nearly broke a tear thinkin of his absence, on how he used to be so noisy and commenting away on everything he could. it was always busy and crazy with him ard, never once was there a quiet moment at such occasions. but this time round felt so diferent. some were tryna break the ice with quirky conversations and heart-felt jokes. others juz immersed themselves with the quiet memories and glazed their sights upon the tv, with only their eyes revealin the truth. i miss him loads, and im sure he knows that. watz left is the huge regret that will never stop bothering me. he's left, without seeing his fav grandkid soar the skies and reach for the stars.

ive taken to saree fashion as of late. its smth bout these customary costumes that seem to dazzle even the greatest of stars. handiworks of phabolous fingers and nimble minds put together to create such astonishing masterpieces. so fine is the intricasy that it puts the sparkle to whueva models it. its the simple sex appeal that catches the eye, i guess. and the way fushion introduces the east and west in sensational! the once used 'rajesthan tops' have made way for halter necks and bikini tops. wat a way to go for being 'traditional'!

i feel that everyone is movin away from me. boredom ha never been so lonely. most, whu call themselves frens, have been distancing themselves from me. i don feel close to anione animore.. its like ive got no one to turn to these days. pple whu were close to me seem to have vanished. thay have taken to the happier side, clinging on to other frens whu can promise better value and fun. i spend ma days at home abiding the four walls and a laptop, which has become ma only fren. its like no one's there animore. ive never felt this lonely. pple come back to me and give me high hopes but destroy it the very next instant they find someone else to leech on. wat wrong have i done to mankind?? why is everybody, EVERYBODY, movin away? think about it and let me know aight.

they dont call me "ICEMAN" fer nth...

the stretch of road has gotten dark. i don see any light at the end. i really miss ma grandpa. ive made prolly the biggest regret to date. like why in the fuckin world did i not spend more time with him??? 'nuf said, i wanna join him in harmony. he still lingers in ma memory, and has brushed past in ma dreams. anth to bring back the good 'ol days. but as we all fuckin know, fate has other plans. besides that everything else is in a mess, duplicated turmoil in the heartlands. life has lost its value as a implicable 4-letter word that surrounds destiny. angels have lost its wings. the truth has began to show itself upon wat mankind preaches as eternity. u know every woman claims they need atleast 4 basic animals; a mink coat in the closet, a jaguar in the driveway, a tiger in bed and a jackass to pay for it all. but if they so desperately need tha company of animals why come to us men and fake innocence? do we look like 4-legged furry creatures that lack the domains of a sixth sense? crazy feature.

Oh ma God, this is MA jam...

now that ive got this darn job out of the way, i needa really sit and plan ma life thtz ahead. its so hard to find the perfect job. juz like a perfect woman, which is off course juz a myth, the perfect job never seems to present itself to anyone. someone said i ought to be a lawyer, but tht gave meaning to a whole new bullcrap. then someone mentioned being a politician. but over here, it aint nth more than a puppet to a tyrant. unless i take to the footsteps of the late mr. jeyaretnam and be as radical as can be. but off course i do not plan to get exiled or anth, yet, so maybe that option is out as well. and then of course there's the one marvellous job that has been eluding many yet enticing some; a teacher. yes, i wana be a teacher! i wanna preach physical education to a nation that has been engulfed by the fast-food franchise. i wanna sit all the lil children down and drill some 'fitness sense' into them. then again id prolly be tormented by the lil rascals, and thtz when u will see me being chased ard by thirty odd cute lil brainiacs.

i stepped into the gym after a mnth and boy have i missed training like crazy. im starting training again and im goin all out this time. id prolly be goin everyday from now on. and besides i needa get ma mind of certain things, and people. and if u have the freakin time, do check out ma gym's blog and watch the two demo vids of ma coach. he's freakin insane, and he's deft an inspiration. btw, he's the one wearing the black shorts. cheerioz!

I need smeone right beside me now...

life has never been down b4. i worked like a dog for a mnth and they have the fuckin cheek to screw up my pay! i might as well join a production team and work as a factory worker for the amount im gettin with this fuck of a company im workin for. and cuz of tht im broke now. its my fuckin off day and i cant even go out. im stuck at home facing the four walls and dreading the hours away. and not to mention ive got nobody to go out with either. im juz a bloody loner whu seeks people, for ive never been seeked by anyone else. am i tht ugly or smth? or are people gettin so money-faced that poor freaks like me do not deserve to have friends? the only other thing free besides an applause was friendship but even tht ship has been tagged with a price! i feel so ever lonely and down now. i need someone by my side now. the passing of my grandpa has not subdued inside me and its in this lonely hours tht i think of him. tears hve become my best friend. sadness has become my only company in this darkest hours. i realy need someone by my side to help me through this dark trecherous road. to the ones i already have plz stop ditching me for the happier side. the end of the road looks ableak and im looking for a fork road. contemplating suicide wasnever an option but id rather be cast away alone on a island with nth but the company of boredom and the jubliation of death.

W.O.M.E.N

its so hard to find the, or shal i say, a proper woman these days. as hard as they get, they simply resemble men. long gone were those wrinkled days where feminine was the word to go amongst women. now it seems, that thet word masculine has been re-defined by the very same mortals. but then there are some biches whu venture out to spoil the good name of all merry women out there. litle can be said of such dwellings for all they proclaim is self-respect and what they give out is utter disgust. respect yaself, and be respected. degrade ya dignity, and the words will follow suit.

SAD.ness.DENED

its so blody hard! damn i miss tht old man! i cant seem to digest that bitter fact till now! its like he was juz ard a few days ago and now he's gone? kinda odd that God takes away the good souls and lets the demented stay and roam this earth.or this was prolly why he had to go in the first place, for sucha man was not meant to dirty his feet on such soiled grounds called earth. but its gonna be real hard without him now. sucha dilemma has be-fallen this family and the empire is shaken at the lost of its king. a huge regret im sitting upon, for i never took the effort to spend much time with him in the last few years. well ma dear fren wherever you are, please do take care and remove whatever obstacles life has in store for me aight? wat are buddies for right!

Eternal Serenity.

till death do us apart. or so they say. but what we part are just the memories of a lifetime. life is such an uncertainty. dwellings that were meant to meet their doom. sudden gestures of God that take us off balance. a likely situation that many would face, but not wat i had expected to happen with me. a twist of fate as they had it, and i sit meticulously striving through the years of growing up and i realised i have lotsa making up to do. to one, whu has passed on, ma sincere apologies for not being there through the last years. all the tears i shed cant be compared to the amount of guilt i have inside. i'll teribbly miss you. be good up there aight. it was splendid having you as a grandad, but too bad good things always come to an end. sometimes i wonder what He has in store for us. like why take away the good people and keep the scumbags on earth? or has He justified the fact that earth is indeed a place for such shitheads and screwballs to roam on? i sometimes wish i cd join the loved ones up there. away from all these misery that the world has to offer. too bad, ma time hasnt come i guess. and i must have sinned alot in ma past life to have to go through this hell-of-a-life in this lifetime.

Women in ponytails, who do their nails

its been a long time since i wrote any shits down, and thtz cause i have had no time to even sit at the computer table ever since i started work! im in a total mess! or shd i say the company i work for is in a total pile or crap?!! its been 2nd week of work and nobody has came forward with the contract-signing, and tht puts me in the 'phantom' position in the company!! haha im juz a ghost in black and white cause i do not exist on the database!! i can juz choose to leave, walk-out or in ma context dissapear anytime i want. but ive made equal attempts to ensure i do get ma worth's pay in an event i decide to stay till the end of the month and more. ma shifts are horrible and i work amlost everyday in a week! i know feel the importance of stayin home on off days as the other 6 days are spent at work. i get ma ass back, sit for 5 mins and off to bed juz to get up at 4 in the morn to hit work. boy ive never spent this much of money on cabs in one week!! im hoping things wd turn out better. fuck i shd have thought twice b4 agreeing to this shithole. i miss the good old days. i wanna run away. i wanna elope. and im super underpaid for the shit i do. so many regrets in life. and all i have as a companion is alcohol. thank you ma frend.

Zoo-Logical Garden of Eden

Have you seen the lions at the zoo? you can tell which ones are wild and which ones have been caught long. all the fire in the eyes have been washed after mnths enclosed by a moat and being fed shreds of meat by a stranger less known. as time wears upon them, they tire down in their lil corners and nurse the wounds of time. a man sitting in a 3 by 3 cell with no windows and a bucket to shit in would feel the same way. he practically dies of and then starts the next devil bitting of his nails and chewing off his toes. being alone pretty much feels the same way too. being single after a LONG while is beginning to take its toll. being single was never in the agenda and im quite lost now. i need guidance. haha interestingly enough the olympics has ended and im back to boredom. i miss the fuckin olympics!! thank God im starting work otherwise life wd be insanity stuck in a cell. i think thai boxing shd be included as one of the 203 sports featured in the games. wd be interesting to see some serious beating, and not watch the lazy boxers run ard the ring to avoid gettin hit, instead of going at each other like bulls. i juz realised tht im a counter-fighter, and i double up as an elusive-fighter as well. maybe thtz why i prefer retaliation to mindlessly going for the kill. but i always thought i was the tricky fighter though. hmm. deceptions played out even in the assessment...

Women, the equivalent of Deception.

real women are hard to come by these days. why do i make sucha claim? cuz women these days only fit the physical descriptions. inside, they're cold as men are. or even worse. gone were the days where true women were demure and elegant, yet spoke of confidence and walked with grace. 'women' these days take the form of men in its ugliest form. eternity speaks of truth ad time has taken a very harsh toll on mankind. its like the general characteristics of each have changed places. what happened to the phrase,"ladies and gentlemen"? have men really become gentle and women taken to the opposites?

i want a woman whu exudes confidence and grace in her stance. someone whu can proficiently carry a mature conversation without having to slam the fone down a million times. someone whu isnt too much into make-up, or being over obsessed bout being 'glamour' and all. the essential of each is fine, but over doing it seems to turn me off. someone whu doesnt rebel to the bones and gives in when required. i hate those naturally hard-headed women whu fucking cannot lose their pride, ego or face at any cost. if women began behaving this way, then wars would be next best thing in our daily routines.

and certainly not the kind whu have developed a neck for fighting, literally. everytime i pick up the fone in eager, the loudhailer on the other side cant seem to stop. i want someone pure, lady-like and easy to be with. not hard numbskulls whu wd never fuckin give in. being cute and lovable definetly has a bonus point. such people are just easy to be with, and i certainly don wanna end up with a women whu makes me feel inferior! im a bloody simple person so i dont wanna date a top model or anth! and i FUCKIN HATE women whu dig bikes, or bikers alike. i want a woman whu loves you for wat u have and not what she wd like a guy to have!

if u ask me which part of a woman's body turns me on the most id say her mind, for thatz where all the erm 'nice' thoughts are being conjured. haha. so intellectual women definetly turn me on. education isnt everything, but if ure shrewd enough to keep yaself ahead of everybody else and still make the millions then why wont u be welcomed ma dear?and i have smth for women whu are fit and in sexy shape, esp those with long slender legs. wat can u expect from someone whu eats, sleeps and breathes fitness!!

Fun-nee to see...

Ma darling has done it again...Allyson Felix has trumphed past her debacle in the 200m to giver her team the upper hand in the 4x400m finals, thus giving them the gold in an event tht nearly saw the beautiful russsians cause an upset. oh tht stunningly beautiful women stretched past shericka williams of jamaica and mesmerized me with her oozing appeal of confidence, let alone make the men ard the world fall to their knees.

But wat a pity the fastest team women cd boast crashed out of the qualifying round. damn wat a fuckin waste. practically four of the fastest women in the planet made up the team and yet a botched baton passing saw them seeing red instead of gold.

Kings of track...

3 golds, 3 records. a near clean sweep of the sprint events for Jamaica. Magic has cast its spell and the american stranglehold has been checked. Too bad the fastest women's team in the world cdnt keep the Jamaican flag flyin high. A pity that wd have been deeply felt, but in a way enabled the photographers to chase the gorgeous russians 'behinds' after they clinched the gold.

And training begins...

Im in a loss for words.

Like watever happened to the americans?? and wat the fuck have the jamaicans been eating?? Usain "The King" Bolt as done it again, this time demolishing the 200m field in a new world record. fucking 2 sprint golds, fuckin 2 world record, and a fuckin sprint champion. like wat does he fucking eat? he doesnt tie his laces, yet he slows down to the finish line to see his competitors far off.

And then u have the other fellow green-and-yellow team mates of his whu seem to have the neck of winning as well, and have completely demolished the american stranglehold. everytime during a medal ceremony, i see mostly bright yellows over the traditional white-and-blue. and with the remaining relay events to come, and with the suprise exclusion of the american relay teams, i think i will be abale to sing the jamaican anthem by end of the olympics

The american sprints coach ought to take back his words, when he told the media "that this was prolly the strongest squad being sent." strong it is, but it aint enough up match the mighty jamaicans, whose rise to power has definetly made many question marks. Gay, reigning world champ not only crashed out of the 100m, but screwed his team's chances in the relay by dropping the baton. and the women followed suit wit such synchronisation. talk bout being 'UNITED states of America...

More pics comin up....ladies please don be unfazed by the latest happenings. i AM still alive and kicking...life wil head back to normal...*Muacks*

WATCH and learn

and there u have it folks, pictures speak of a milestone. he came, he flew, and he conquered the day WITH HIS LACES UNTIED! damn like wat the fuck is he made off??

All-Limp-Pigs

for all the fools whu have been missing out on the sporting scene, this happy-go-lucky chap practically jogged past the world's elite to grab prolly the most prized gold in the track and field industry, thus re-writing his own world record.

basically, for all the fools out there whu dont know shits bout wat im tokin, Usain bolt, the world's fastest man, won the century sprint in a time that no man ever dreamt bout. like wtf, he slowed to nearly a jog at the last fuckin 8metres or so and still smashed the record. imagine wat he wd have clocked if he had gone all the way?!!

a man from another planet, he showed no fear at all. all his antics and display of clown-li-ness made me wonder wat kinda magic he had conjured. if i cd get ma hands on the video of tht race id post it up here. i juz cdnt beleive ma eyes at the feat he carried out.

less said, he's stil world champ. and he's gonna be ma idol.

Contempt. Conceal. Concave

its been long since i pen-ed down ma thoughts and happenings. but pretty much nothing is goin right for me. im in a fucked up pool of sorrows and miseries and mishaps. my gf left me cuz i have a facebook account and i didnt tell her. talk bout being mindless! ma frends are busy now and no one has ever the time to even tink bout me. its like being born in this life has no reason to it at all. IM FUCKIN SINGLE! READ MA LIPS BITCHES!!

to all the fuckin pussies whu conspired against me, you've won and im stranded alone now. but karma is a motherfuckin bitch and i MAKE SURE IT BITES BACK, HARD!!

im clueless as to what God wants of me in this life. maybe its eternal destruction he has put into wat is caled Fate. i see evil dwellings chasing me ard in ma dreams. i see fairies slaughtered to death and blood is the colour of money. in all i see death beckoning. continous crys have only served to fill the drylands. bu they never reached any ears...

well, im sitting and sipping ma bloodymary now. smokin aint an option now so im biting down chocolates. and im preparing ma application forms. forms that will seperate the pussyfaces from the real women. Ive alreadi got ma wife, but the posts of 'girlfren' and erm 'mistress' are still vacant. so potential candidates, feel free to test ya wrath against ma will! Chiaoz...

procrastination is THE natural assasin.

a million doves meeting tranquility at its best. i see stars shining through clouds, reaching to be called by the many lovebirds on the ground. and i sit a distance from a faraway land under a well-sculpted rock-shelter. to me, the world's ending. i see images pass by, actions undone by man and tears rollin down from everywhere. just where was the peaceful world once sought after by children? i see playgrounds engulfed by poison, and flames eating up livelihoods. economical disease, as they say, has finally met with the rest of the world. ma bloody mary's finishing and i hvnt placed orders for ma cigars either. but i strut ma life on a thin line and watch as the clock ticks away to whole new dilemma. a world that sees no boundaries. a place where humans run amock. and i sit in the middle as king, reading orders from the Gods living in ma apartment, barked by 5 pitbulls and flocked by 27 topless fairies. Now do you feel me?

Liberal?

A women's dignity is THE number one killer. Its not bout respecting others tht come first, but respecting one's self. U dont gain anth by carrying out antics. Just the irritation of one man. If u hate the fact tht a particular lady grazing the lingerie section is directly givin eye signals to ya man, then dont attract unnecessary attention yaself! i mean u want every man to look at you but when another woman oogles at ya man you get all fired up and we get the blame for that too. I mean common, men givin u lewd and dirty looks at ya chest is in no way comparable to a lady sizing a man and applauding is manliness! Why dont women understand this basic principle? We men are not bringin our gfs/wives out to parade them, or shd i say, to entertain other men out there. Keep wat is meant for ya own beloved and dont publicize them ard like they're some public property. Like they say, in Rome, do wat the Romans do.

Regrets. Remorse. Revamp.

A few days. A few seconds. A few actions and "PRESTO" everything was gone.

A split of a second was all it took, and i lost ma life.

A mirage appears before me, and always carries an image of her in it.

A question keeps popping out in ma head...WHY??

My blog requires more words so i guess i needa invest in a good personal assistant. Any takers?

- Death Wish -

why do people juz love talkin bout other guys even after they get attached, more so they come and tell it to their own boyfrends...??

why do people see the fuckin need to talk bout their boyfrens to other people?? clealy i wdnt like it if ma gf talks bout me to her frens!

and for christ's sake ya boyfren aint a God so stop fuckin reporting bout him to others...some are juz fuckin pussies who don black suits and walk the nightlife.

and for all the galfrens out there, keep ya fuckin mouths shut when it comes to other guys aight. you will do a whole lotta favour to the guys whu proclaim you as theirs.

one more day..things arnt gettin any better.

screw this whole damn thing la i just wanna go away from everyone and start anew. im not getting anth positive here.

so for those whu read this plz spread the fuckin word around and not ur fuckin pussies.

Grrrrrr.

Destitue.

a sat night.

im stuck at home.

and everybody else has left me to fend with boredom, alone.

like wat a great way to start the bdae week.

lets just hope it doesnt carry forward to the weekdays...

othawise ill just have to lock maself up behind closed curtains, ignore technological innovations in the fone and internet and brush aside any happiness that others pretend to bring along on tht day.

cheers to this fucked up world.

Unseen stanzas.

why does this only have to happen to me? it looks like my greatest fear is gonna see reality. it seems like im gonna be alone on ma bdae, in contrary to the many years i had before this.

i never had this feeling before, i was happily attached on every other bdaes. interesting, to have a lucky streak broken.

s.h.o.t.d.e.a.d.

I suddenly feel all so lonely now. the presidency claim has shifted sides and i don see a landslide.
its like all the king's men and his horses decided to ditch me for the shadows.

i feel people have left me, left ma side. i feel the vast empty space happily surrounding me since there is nothin else to fill this vacuum.

i have lost all hope there is another life out there. i hate deceptions and everything tht comes along. truth and harmony can spend life together in a cell and share three meals together.

many questions have been left unanswered. i wanna know the truth behind the existence of Bigfoot. and if i will be able to count cards, and maybe read my own future...

White lies...

i dont think im gonna get it.

me and ma big mouth.

then again i was juz doin a favour.

and being nice.

i HOPE somebody gets me IT.

NOT laughing out loud...

and yet another murder took place. i nearly had ma wind knocked out, this time by ma instructor, whu effortlessly took pleasure in testing his own strength against our torsos. and to think that he was laughing while we stood there without guard and absorbed his shots, was not comparable to the fact tht wd cdnt even hit back!

all's good in the hood, and we left smiling anyway.

ysterdae was a spectacle. tomorrow wd be a miracle. i wana learn how to count cards and beat the dealer at his own game. talk bout double-timing a cheat!

Destinyyy

I tasted ma first victory, nearly.
A good fight, a better competitor.

I had my first 'friendly' sparring session on my last training. A mini-contender session took place with the winner goin on to face winners of other matches.

As excited as i was, a sense of fear gripped me as i stepped into the ring. that could very well have been my first major fight, and boy was i so bloody determined to win.

The bell rung, the fight started and everything was goin well. but i got a lil cocky and started dancing ard the opponent. Floating like a butterfly never seemed so real!

and then tragedy struck, prancing around got the better of me and i wrong-footed ma opponent. I guess he caught me on the move and i cdnt react in time. wat came next was sheer agony.

I landed on my toe, bent in. I cant be more graphic to describe the position ma toe was in, but verbally, it was in a hideous contortion. My ALREADY injured toe was bent fully down and i landed on that, bringing my whole body weight along onto it.

The sheer pain shot up my brain and i lost balance. But not before my knees hit the canvas, i was met with a bulldozer of a punch right square in ma face. and it sent me tumbling to the rope. wat a way to end a beautiful fight.

but all was good in the end. handshakes followed the hugs and respect was showered. it was a good day, a good fight. the the pain still lingers, although it will be a gruesome reminder of what could have happened in a real fight...

necklo.matic.dis.order

my body was pushed to the extreme on the last training. ma body was made a mockery off. it was made a laughing stock among the brutal regiment. i cant still feel the aches in the joints and minor muscles such as the hip flexors and abductors. they're cryin out in pain. they do not know the limitaion to what atrocities ma mind holds for them.

we had a major orgy session yeterday. no not that bedroom antic ya thinkin bout. i was thrown into a ring with five others and we were against each other i a gladiator-style sparring contest, minus the blood, drama and glory. and there was no room for the fact tht everyone else atleast had an extra eight kilos packed behind their punches and kicks. that's for being the lightest there.

despite watching countless attempts at goal, Italy brushed past prolly the biggest scare of the tounament. i watched in horror as the referee pointed to the penalty spot, just to have the transmission blank out, having to rely on the screams from the kofishop down stairs. being able to distinguish the diff types of screams brought the drumbeats to a steady motion of heartbeats.

murder as they wrote, takes place on the field with 23 men, and a ball as a murder weapon.

random...

and im still waiting to watch Chocolate.

the TRUTH that saddens

I lost ma fav and lucky ring. my heart nearly broke out in tears. honestly, i hoped the road below the bus wd open up and eat me up. just me only. but i had to bear the pain all the way home.

and ma hair is a MOCKERY. i cant seem to salvage it.

Speak to me.....

i L O V E, L O A T H E training. i wanan do 2wice weekly now. i juz love the pain and sheer orgasm in the ring. im SERIOUSLY undertrained! i need more pain. i wanna hit bag more.

damn. give me the chance, i'd do 5 day weekly. prolly 2wice a day. nvm. i dont think il live long after tht. but watz more to life than to live?

on another note. Sex and the City killed the boredom outta me. i juz found a new meaning to the word 'die'. i died and came back last night after the movie ended. and to think that throngs of women filled the seats to the brim juz to catch a glimpse of a few topless scenes and sarah jessica parker gettin the boot from her man.

tsk.

Goldilocks

the barber screwed ma hair!!!

i look like chicken little..or so wat they claim.

damn im heart broken.

i nearly cried when i exited the shop.

to see all the chunks of hair fallin down and onto the floor...

and now i look like a war has run down ma head!

The Art of Killing One's Self...

ive grown pretty accustomed to pain. its in my insanity that im able to put up with such immense pleasures. i love the feel of canes against ma bones, sand-filled bags against ma legs. i can almost see maself drifting into another world when the onslaught begins to take its toll.

ive grown pretty accustomed to pain, really. they say the tongue is a deadly weapon. thatz why they keep it locked up behind bars of teeth and a mouth of steel. i'ma linguist, and yet ma words are tied before her. nothing much seems to get out of ma sayings.

pain, like ive proclaimed is just in the mind. physically, its just a cluster of time thatz meant to torment you. i feel like mine has been goin on for ages, and it doesnt seem to be stoppin...

help me.

Do u know the diff between life and death? I've seen it. and the vision is sitting directly across my eyes.

Im sick of life. Ive had it with her. ive seen death through her eyes. there aint a saviour to pull me away from this wreakage. ive seen enough in this lifetime.

she claims im way too much. oh please have u ever been my galfren for once. then why make a whole whoohah and still utter the words 'i love you', when you dont!

my life is so fucked up that i cant seem to turn to anione and pour ma heart out. a rendezvous in the making. and yet she says I'M PSYCHO!

izzit so hard to find a proper galfren? or perhaps even a fren, with no conditions? let alone a human being! i juz wanna sit under the table and cry till the clock stops tickin and the world comes to a standstill.

isnt there any human out there? or am i just prepositioning for the cast of the next season of "Lost"?

Please God, Kill 'em all and YOU sort it out aight?

Shaky fingers

Im tired.

training killed me, im aching once again. but its the agony that gives pleasure. and al of a sudden pain has found a whole new meaning.

Im tired.

nothing sems to be right. i cant seem to get anything for maself. ALL for maself. i juz hate the different mentalities that go around.

Crying a river..

i juz wanna live happily, please, juz leave me alone.


the one person i miss so much right now, strangely, is my brother. army has destroyed our relationship. we dont tok much at home either, but his presence somehow gave me a face to look at every morn when i wake up and every night before i hit the sack. we dont open up bout issues to each other but deep down we both know that we would be there for each other in times of need.

but yet i feel the absence, but from a person whom i so dearly love, yet she does not see it. for they say love is blind, and she's juz got a blindfold over her eyes.

am i speakin nuts? YOU decide.

B I T C H es Galore....

CAN ALL YOU BITCHES GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY LIFE!!!! CAN U FUCKIN ROTTEN PUSSIES STOP MESSING AROUND MY LIFE!!

STOP MESING UP MY RELATIONSHIP! AND FUCKIN STOP GOIN AROUND TELLIN PEOPLE THAT I STILL CONTACT YOU BITCHES!!!

LEAVE ME ALONE!! LET ME LIVE IN PEACE! GET A FUCKIN LIFE AND GET THE FUCK OUTTA MA LIFE!!!

WHY THE FUCK ARE U BITCHES SO LIFELESS??? STOP SCREWIN UP MA LIFE!! U FUCKIN GUTLESS PIECES OF SHIT!!!

IM HAPPY FINALLY HAPPY AFTER SO LONG. SHE'S THE ONE. JUST LEAVE US ALONE AND STOP TRYNNA BREAK US UP!!

U FUCKIN PUSSIES SHOULD BE FUCKIN TAUGHT A LESSON. I WANT TO LIVE HAPPILY WITH HER SO STOP SPREADING RUMOURS ABOUT ME AND STOP WANTING TO FIND OUT BOUT ME!!

IM NO FUCKIN STAR SO PLEASE FIND SOMEBODY ELSE TO FUCK AROUND WITH. I DON WANNA RESORT TO TEARIN YA PUSSIES APART BUT IM SICK OF THIS!

AND YOU DUMBWITS CALL YASELVES FRENDS?? O FOR CHRIST'S SAKE STOP YA BULLSHIT AND BOMBARDING HER WITH SHIT.

IF YOU CANT STAND THE MERE FACT THAT SHE IS TOTALLY MINE TELL ME STRAIGHT INTO MA FACE!! OTHAWISE GET DOWN ON YA KNEES AND SUCK MA FUCKIN DICK!!!

sorry for the caps ma laptop was jammed after i threw it on the floor on anger. Thanks bitches.

Life's little secret....

she doesnt love me animore. she's not afraid to lose me. but she doesnt have the guts to tell it to ma face.

wat does she do?? she tortures me and kills me with her words in a hope that I would totally break down and ask her for the break up. how ingenuous of her!

i was stronger before, but now im falling to her onslaught. no thanks to the bitch frens she has, all they want is for us to split. VULTURES they are. Cunning bitches.

ma knees are weaker. ma mind is a whirlwind. ma words are dried up. i cant seem to fight the battle any longer.

i juz love her to much i guess. i cant seem to get her off ma mind at all! she's like glued to even ma imagination. and yet she makes me cry everytime i dash to answer her calls.

how can one proclaim love when all they do is torture and make one cry? im destroyed inside. i dont even know wat's keepin me goin!

why cant these maffuckers mind their own buisness?? why are they so dedicated to research bout me and dig into our relationships? looks likes even girls these days deserve to get whacked so as to drive some sense into their fuckin empty numbskulls!

such pussies whu aint got the guts to face me, but yet they hide behind ma back and leave distinguished scars, so as to proudly claim a stake in splitting this relationship.

WHY ARE INDIANS LIKE THAT? these peices of shit give the majority a bad name. or maybe its more like just everybody else make up the word 'shit', with an exception of few off course.

i do not want to resort to violent tactics, im a man of peace. but juz dont think im gonna sit ma ass down and watch you destroy ma life. i will dig out ya eyes, unplug ya noses, unclip ya jaws and then FINALLY BREAK YA FACES INTO TWO IF I HAVE TO!!!

peace.

fate.

WAT WRONG DID I DO TO HER??? wat wrong did i ever do to anybody!!! she just makes me wanna cry and tear ma hair out every single night! I NEED HELP!!!

does anybody hear ma cries??? im goin crazy.....wahh i juz cant seem to sit still and take all this shit! PLZ SOMEBODY HELP ME?

an avenue to release some unhappy thoughts, vent some frustration. thtz all.

all i have done is cried.

[-<-_->-]

im fightin a losing battle. either i stay and put up wid the shit or i leave. therez no 2 ways bout it.
then how do i accertain the battle posture hence forth?

things have gotten out of ma hand now. and fate seems to be playin twisted mind games wid me. to no avail am i in the position to play otherwise.

so izzit gonna be battle or the white flag?
You be the judge and decide ma fate. im Open to all alternates.

{A Distant Distance}

i juz do not know wat to babble animore. im lost for words in this thick jungle. the people ard me are playin games. its hot outside and im fuming on the inside. im broke and i wanna rob a bank. so ladies out there, if ya had ever wanted to be rollin in the big bucks, now's the time to hook me up. i didnt train much yesterdae either and ma coach's headin back to thailand for a week so once again i gotta wait 2 fuckin damn weeks to hit bag again! but ma toe was aching like fuck last night and i cdnt kick at all. so fuckin pissed so fuckin dissapointed. and i was dutifully humbled to the ground went i took on ma coach for a round of sparring. ma confidence level took a plunge. all the pad-kickin and bag-hittin made me think i was up to any challenge. when i stepped into the ring against the champion, he made mince meat outta me in seconds! haha i mean i was appalled by his mere technique. not to mention, he was effortless in his quest to bring all of us to the canvas. the only consolation was that i didnt meet the floor but i had to withstand a barrage of well-aimed punches and well placed kicks that he happily meted out with a cheeky smile. well wat else cd he say; just kill 'em all and let God sort it out.

Sons (and daughters) of a bitch.

Just a gentle reminder to the maffuckers out there.

I dont entertain pple runnin their mouths all over the place, bitchin behind ma back and bullcrap like that.

I will put ma foot into ya mouths, literally. You got the fuckin guts to gossip bout me come stand me in ma nose and face me. Unless ya a pussy off course then go play ya game elsewhere.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is just a gentle reminder to BUCKLE up ya seatbelts, for otherwise failure to do so would NOT be pleasant in the ROUGH weather to come.

Cheers pussy faces and dickheads.

Sex Lies and Deceit

and it still hurts! no i mean genuinely it still tweaks at the slightest movement. its now i realise the importance of 'once-a-week' trainings. imagine sendin ma toe back to the heavy bag the followin day wid sucha swell!

im a-blur at certain issues. am i supposed to leave it all and walk the lone path? or should i fall to temptations and keep maself abreast of the latest scandals and deceits...i read the minds of women presumably well and hence i should speak to those whu heed my warning; the reluctant male race.

a few good men passed on a few lil lessons but i chose to head south where the treasure promised me hope. and wat i saw was the truth, that nothin was permanent and the one whum you seek is juz next to you. mistakes made and i realise how much of makin up i have to do.

I AM SORRY. these words hardly a reflection of how she feels right now i understand. but wat takes time is a mere vacuum for emotions to blossom. im headin north now, and lets see what in store over there for me...

- Bloodsport -

the wait to train has finally revealed its repurcussions. i finally got ma first injury!

haha as sadist as i may sound, the sprained toe is a mere reflection of ma passion for the sport. though its kinda unbearable.

i wonder wat more i have to break or undergo just to attain glory in such a fearsome sport. but as they always say the more you sweat in the gym, the less you bleed in the ring. so bring on the bone collector!!

A Democratic Republican.

True love...haaah...ma ass!

its some shit thtz meant up in heaven and does not see its place down here. im a lost bird trynna get out of civilisation and into the wilderness. for i seek glory, in its path lay a treacherous form called life. do i fit in this world...do i fit in hers?

two days that saw nor heard any word. for i had to cling on to other dwellings to breathe life into me. the distant cry of a voice that holds herself back and not showing me all the true splendours of beauty. now wat grave sin did i commit to land maself in such deminds?

i want more money. i had to wait another week for training. i wanna hit two places. but capital isn't in my corner. its poverty and headache that are standing in ma side.

i just aint feelin good bout anth! im in the lowest phase in ma life right now. the ones ard me make me feel that way. ive lost hope in everyone. there isnt a soul that wants to pull me along in life. or maybe there are but too little perhaps? an inner self that picks up tears and washes time away in despair.

have i written enough you ask. have u felt enough i answer. to ask is one's way of letting himself go to the world ard him/her. to answer is to provide consolence. and im still seeking anwers to this riddle...

Heart's Desire.

Dont ask me why i cry, ask urself why you make me do so...

the case of the Australian sex scandal comes to light, like they never saw daylight, i dont see the light animore too.

im not happy animore, not at all. lust has been shoved, but ma emotions have been brutally and savagely murdered.

i kinda realise tht the frequent and active bloggers are infact attached. but like me, they cant rely on their other halves and hence turn to this emo outlet to let their pain out.

so i 'FEEEEEEL' their pain and agony.

on a slightly brighter note, i wanna train everyday, if i had the fuckin money tht is.

bleed now, fight later.

MURDER!

That's the word to describe 2day's training...

BUT

as everybody knows, Murder = Orgasm

trust me ma mind was sent to anther dimension, but in the end pleasure is wat i derived from what turned out to be just another day at training...

deATh just pLAys a ParT

i have lost all forms of social life.

i have lost any existing freedom that i once had.

in summary, im juz a walking corspe.

i want my life back.





can somebody help me..?

Whooolalalalaaa!

Another hot ASS car........

Country Grammer n MC Hammer

wipe tht smirk off ya face you fat ass cuz it aint there animore.

being the joker was INDEED ya cup of tea afterall...

and stick to ya hose will you cuz the onli other thing tht u'll be holding wd be MY gun!!
(pssst...i heard it shoots bullets too...try it!!)

-| spell and smell like hell |-

every single inch in ma body is tearing out and expanding.

pushing yaself beyond the limit does have its defects.

and i had to learn it the hard way...

but training was fun...i wanna train more....like MORE!!!

Random la...

i need a bloody phone!!!

im on a fuckin budget an yet i wish for the stars.
i have to revamp ma wish list..it contains information that may rattle my parents' pockets.

im bored stuck at home..then again I have to keep in mind that many dont even have a home!

on the irrelevant..i still think that female beach volleyball-ers have incredible behinds.

and im still thinking...haiz

B-E-A-U-tiful Boxer

Yodsanklai is king!
A king befitting the throne...

I wanna train in thailand. thatz my dream, or should i say goal...

But for now, im just lookin forward to thur's training.
and i still insist that im under-trained.

Check out this vid.

Buakaw vs JWP K1'04

http://www.livevideo.com/video/38B1D86F2F504130B82FAF368F862835/match3-buakaw-por-pramuk-vs-.aspx

Midsummer Night

to the vast oceans, the sky is juz the mirror image of itself. to the world's misery, im its mirror reflectant. to sit down and sip down the tequilas require great wisdom as one would say to the other in an intense showdown of knowledge. what you see is what you get. but not every issue shares the same perspective. the downfall of one's emotions is the beginning of another journey, which will eventually lead to another downfall, and so on and so forth. yet i speak the truth that many fail to see. why do people say that love was formed in the heavens and ends in hell? tears of blood trinkle down the mountains tht kiss the heavens and yet they worship this form of 'sacrifice'. indeed, for it is true that love, IS blind...

..............

I FOUND THE CAR TOO HOT TO HANDLE

*Doinkers*

i was supposed to train today.

but some fuck decided to play me out.

and some people cant watch their mouths right early in tha mornin.

makes sense?

you figure.

I'ma believer!

I cant believe i doin this but to no extent am i an emo freak with scratch marks longer than ma prick. it wd be however fun to criticise the world's population and receive brickbats at a rate faster then u can say "iyumtoopid". everbody seems to be here writing their life away as if millions are pouring in on Euro notes. i wdnt blmae them, they're juz followin the fad. i wdnt be surprised if i did it one day but till that inevitable happens, get down on ya knees and carry on wid wat u were gorging at aight??